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Rants of the Ring

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[28 Dec 2005|12:42pm]

I have a LOTR fansite in need of some fanmade graphics..if you're interested please visit my site (www.freewebs.com/lord_of_the_rings16/) and contact me. Thanks!!!

Shameless Comm. Pimpin'Collapse )

[25 Feb 2005|03:29pm]

Title: The Lord of the Rings REWRITE!

{Sauron strides onto the battlefield}
{Orcs cheer}
Sauron: {Bows} Oh thank you thank you! (Shows his ring) Look, I didn’t drop it this time! {Starts laughing evilly} Die! {Starts killing people by shooting rays out of the ring}
Elrond: (Confused) Is that even possible from the Ring?
Random Man: {Shrugs}
Elrond: (Dreamy eyes) Awesome.

Gollum: It came to me, my own, my love, my own, my wonderful!
{Ring bites him}
Gollum: Bad wonderful! {Chucks it at wall}

To read more of this hilarious rewrite of the classic Lord of the Rings story please join 'nightly_stories'

Every week a new chapter will be uploaded with pictures to go along with it. Please leave any comments/questionsreviews in a response to the update!

Please get all your friends to join the community to read this wonderful once in a life time story.

~ Kelsey & Lady Riniel of nightly_stories

this is soo cool - xposted [02 Dec 2003|11:26am]

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Middle Earth Re-enactment club.. http://members.aol.com/gijchar/mehr.htm

more on Orlando Bloom [12 Nov 2003|12:15pm]

This show was in a list emailed to me by my tutor The Blue Shirted Nazgul looking for film crew:

Kingdom Of Heaven
Drama about an English blacksmith who goes to fight in the
Crusades. Orlando Bloom is slated to take the lead.

More info:

Crimson Communications
211a Station House
49 Greenwich High Road,
020-8305 6905

Tolkien silver anniversary / costumes xposted [10 Nov 2003|01:57pm]

[ mood | chipper ]

I was sent this on Yahoogroups and thought that you guys would like to see these bits of info****************************************

The Ring Goes Ever On

Celebrating 50 Years of The Lord of the Rings

11-15 AUGUST 2005



To mark the 50th anniversary of the publication of The Lord of the
Rings, The Tolkien Society announces a major international conference
and convention combining scholarship, celebration and commemoration.

Tolkien 2005: The Road Goes Ever On will be a worldwide gathering of
Tolkien readers and enthusiasts, students of Tolkien's writings and
artists responding to those writings, performers, actors and adapters;
collectors and curators; bibliographers and philologists; established
academics, new researchers and creative writers; journalists,
publishers, biographers, commentators and film-makers. Tolkien 2005
will represent one of the first large-scale international gatherings
of Tolkien readers to meet in the wake of the completion of Peter
Jackson's screen versions of The Lord of the Rings and will endeavour
to reflect this in its range of activities and interests.

The conference organisers now announce a first call for papers.
Lectures, seminars and panel presentations are invited on all aspects
of the writings of J. R. R. Tolkien. The conference encourages
submissions intended for a variety of audiences: academic and literary
critical contributions are welcome, as are responses aimed more
broadly at the wide diversity of Tolkien readers and filmgoers.
Contributions should combine sound scholarship with accessibility.

Emerging conference themes include:

· Art and Illustration

· Authors responding to Tolkien

· Dramatisation and film adaptation

· Publication histories

· Translation

· Philology and The Languages of Middle-earth

· Ecology and Environment

· Ethics, Power and Conflict

· Tolkien and War

· Popularity and the legacy of Tolkien

· Gender and identity

· Myth, Fantasy and Romance patterns

· Characterisation and narrative

· The Inklings

· Tolkien on the Internet

· Tolkien and recent fantasy literature

· Tolkien in literary theory and cultural studies

Expressions of interest and proposals should be sent (no deadline) to

Dr Bob Davis
University of Glasgow, St Andrews Building
11 Eldon Street
G3 6NH
United Kingdom
or e-mail 2005.programme@tolkiensociety.org

Further information may be found at:

Any queries regarding this Press Release should be addressed to:
Ian Collier, Publicity Officer, 45 Caldew Maltings, Bridge Lane,
Carlisle, CA2 5SW
e-mail publicity@tolkiensociety.org


Apraently Museaum Replicas has entered a licencing agreement with
New Line so there will be "official" costumes issued.

Go to: http://store.museumreplicas.com/cgi-bin/www11650.storefront
then scroll down to the LOTR text.

They're showing things for Frodo, Gandalf and Legolas. Mentioning
things about Arwen but nothing showing yet.

The pictures doen't show things clearly.

These are not "in the bag" Halloween costumes so that means the
quaility is supose to be higher. Since these are "officially
licenced", any and all discussion is allowed here. This should help
though of you who are non sewers


Orlando Bloom magazine [07 Nov 2003|08:22am]

[ mood | drunk ]

After a drunken foray into the city centre yesterday evening i got two copies of a magazine, Weatherspoon, its a pub magazine, with a cover and 2 page article with photos, inside of Orlando Bloom.. (and some interesting news on Pirates of the Carribean) Anyway i have two copies and while one "is mine!!!! My preciousssssssssss!!!" i wondered if anyone would like to swap for the other. I am UK based but will send worldwide - and i will send my half of the swap.. I will swap for another LOTR item - email me with your offer.... (warrior_of_bushido@yahoo.co.uk)


HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BILLY! [28 Aug 2003|08:32pm]

[ mood | tired ]

Happiest of Birthdays to Billy Boyd today! 35 years old! My my! :)


A bit o'slash... [09 Aug 2003|02:51pm]

[ mood | dirty ]

Don't. Say. Anything.

slash o'rama


[30 Jun 2003|08:40pm]

Anybody ever wonder who the actors are who play the hobbits from a distance? Children or midgets?
2 rings| precious?

Well... [02 Mar 2003|05:42pm]

[ mood | amused ]

I just came across this thing I wrote awhile ago -- a little perverted look at the names of the LOTR cast. Thought it would make peoples giggle, so here you all go, save for you chillins with the hairy feet! *points to door* This is not suitable for the youngin's.

Viggo Mor-tension, since he hadn't been around Sean Asstin wanted Elijah Wood to help him drive it Holm. Unfortunately he could not, so Viggo Mor-tension went over to Sean Bean, who had a wee little Bean, just not big enough to drive it Holm. Still, Viggo Mor-tension did not want to use his Monaghan to gain an Orli-gasm, and he felt there was only one other to ask: Billy who had quite an extremely large Boyd. Again he was turned down, for Billy...he just wasn't into that sort of thing. He'd rather Park-er it in Kristi's...ah, you know where. Feeling very alone and horny, Viggo Mor-tension wandered the vastness of...erm...McKellan-d, looking for a mate. He searched three days and three nights, losing hope with every step he took, for the refusal of even Billy's Boyd was enough to kill a man. BUT...things soon changed for the better, when he came across a whore and her John Rhys-Davies. The whore was none other than Miranda and Viggo Mor-tension felt he Otto ask her to help him with his Orli-gasm. He went over to her, shy as a wee pup, and said, "Ms. will you help me drive it Holm?" She looked at him strangely and told him to "join the Serkis, one can really Liv there".

3 rings| precious?

Posted by cecile [02 Mar 2003|12:52pm]

[ mood | cheerful ]

I stumbled on her rant of the two towers and found it entertaining!

I started writing a list of all the things that annoyed me in the Two Towers. There are so many, I have to hide that behind a lj-cut.

The cringing scenes :
- the worst thing is obviously Faramir. I loved the work on Boromir in the first movie. Why treat the brother like this ? I admired him so much in the book. Now all his nobility is gone. Why is he such an idiot ? What's the point ? This is not Faramir, the scholar prince we love, the one who's not seduced by the ring. It's a new totally different character who behaves even worse than Boromir. Hey, peter jackson, at that point you might as well make up your own names for your invented characters.
Why such a change ? I'm afraid it's only so Aragorn appears more heroic and kingly. So there's only one human-that's-not-gonna-get-killed that we're supposed to like. OK. We get it. Everybody loves Aragorn already, I mean, I melt at the guy's feet, did they really need to do that ? Make sure no other human is interesting and likeable ? Morons.
The awful scene when Faramir takes the hobbits to Osgiliath for no reason. Let me sum it up. Frodo goes to a wall in ruins, almost gives the ring to a Nazgûl, and upon seeing THAT, Faramir "understands" Frodo and is suddenly convinced that he is just the right person to take the ring to Mordor, and it will be better than giving the ring to Denethor ? WTF ? Does anybody see any logic in that ? I sure don't.
I was looking forward to the scene where Sam is an idiot and reveals about the ring. No hint of that. Instead, Frodo and Sam openly talk about the ring in front of Faramir and all the rangers of Ithilien like it's no big deal. Could Peter Jackson show some credibility and decency sometimes ? No.
- Aragorn : who on earth is ever going to believe even for a second that he's dead ? Not even people who haven't read the books, they will think "pfff yeah he's one of the major characters, no way he dies so early, plus they just did that to the wizard guy too..." That's stupid, cheap and cheesy (I should copy&paste that sentence already. I might have to use it a lot).
- the Ents : so they decide not to attack Isengard, then change their minds in two seconds. Huh ? Isn't that, maybe, THE OPPOSITE of how Ents behave ? They just look big and stupid. And Treebeard telling Merry and Pippin to go home ? Whatever. At that point...
- the Elves at Helm's Deep : WRONG ! Wrong in so many ways ! WRONG ! A second Last Alliance ? Please... They should have shown Lorien and the Lonely Mountain attacked : that would have been a better way to show all the "free peoples" of Middle Earths are concerned. Plus the elves seem useless, from what we see, would the battle have been different without them ? No. Thanks for coming.
- Theoden : there's something wrong with him. He's shallow, he doesn't believe in his people, he takes the wrong decisions... That's not the Theoden Merry grows to love.
- all the Arwen kissing. I imagine my elves to be more... I don't know, untouchable ? I would admit they can have sex but I just don't want to see it, OK ? She's an elf. I don't want to see a close up shot of her boobs. Cheap.
- the run-to-the-bomb olympic uruk-hai : did anybody else sing the them of Chariots of fire in his head ?
- Gandalf's rebirth : too explicit. Same thing for Theoden's "possession" and "exorcism".
- Legolas surfing down the stairs on a shield. Yeah, why not directly cast Jackie Chan if that's the kind of show they wanted? After all he's as elfic as the guy who plays Haldir. Haldir. Worst casting ever.
- the winged balrog : ah, the everlasting controversy. I don't think they have wings. I don't think they can fly. I know there are arguments for both sides. I liked that Jackson kept the ambiguity on that in the Moria scenes, maybe the balrog had wings, maybe not, you couldn't really tell, and I thought it was a nice touch. Now obviously he has chosen his side. (I'm just thinking, isn't it kinda hard to wield the Whip of Flame with two giant wings ?)
- Frodo drawing a sword on Sam : ??????? just so wrong.
- Maybe I dreamt that one, I'll have to make sure when I see it again : when the orcs want to eat Merry and Pippin, one (Grishnakh ?) says something like "Looks like meat is back on the menu". Menu ? MENU ? YEAH CAUSE I BET ORCS GO TO RESTAURANTS ALL THE TIME IN MIDDLE EARTH YEAH YEAH THANK YOU PETER JACKSON YOU ARE SO CLEVER. Sure there must be a menu for the orcs in Barad-Dûr and Isengard. Such loooovely places.
- Elrond's attitude : so Elrond is a controlling, selfish father ? That's the son of Elwing and Eärendil, one of the greatest elves, the Peredhil full of wisdom, who lived in Middle Earth for more than six thousand years ? I don't think so. And are we supposed to think Elrond hates Aragorn ? It's just silly.
- Arwen : lying to Elrond, pretending she'll go to Valinor... I understand it's supposed to be tragic ? Doesn't work for me.
- I hated the effects when Frodo falls into the Dead Marshes. Cheap.
- Galadriel's speech : wtf ? Why do we need to see her ? Does PJ think we would forget her if she wasn't in the number two ? Or does he think it's nice to have her speak at the beginning of the first one, the middle of the second one, the end of the third ? Or is he just trying to justify the Elves turning up at Helm's Deep ? Are we supposed to believe she and Elrond have a telepathic conversation ? In any case : useless.
- the warg attack : they're so cheap and ugly. Is Peter Jackson capable of good taste sometimes ? I think we can say NO. Tolkien was so eloquent in describing them... Another impressive waste of time and money.
- All the little kids ? Are we supposed to be moved by that ? to sympathize more ? Not really Tolkien style. I can't believe how much time PJ wasted with stupid shots to show how scared the Rohirrim are, when there's so many things missing that he could have kept instead. Yes ok they are sad and dirty and there are not enough men WE GET IT MOVE ON.
- the stupid inappropriate Gimli jokes. one in the movie = okay. one every ten minutes = not okay
- Sam's speech. good vs. evil... too much Trying-to-Please-the-post-9/11-American-Audience. Just shut up.
- Aragorn and the "you have a good blade" kid. Beyond cheesy and unneeded. I'm so pissed off they named him Haleth, like the warrior woman who guarded the Crossings of Teiglin in the First Age. Oh, don't steal names from the Silmarillion in vain, Peter Jackson, I already hate you enough.

The things missing, that PJ could have included but instead wasted time with so many pointless scenes :
- Where are Erkenbrand and the men of Westfold? Halbarad and the Dunedain ?
- WHERE IS ANDURIL ? Hello, shouldn't the sword be reforged by now ? Aragorn lacks something in the fights, his sword is supposed to be like a flame. But yeah, if you're too busy tossing dwarves, why bother having a nice sword, you gotta have your priorities.
- The Huorns of Fangorn : no victory in Helm's Deep without them. Oh, but I forgot, we don't care about accuracy or plausibility, do we ? Sure, a few Rohirrim are enough to finish thousands of orcs. Whatever.
- I missed Gimli and Eomer fighting in the caves
- there should have been a view of the rainbow curtain at Henneth Annûn
- ent draughts, entwives etc...
- the Voice of Saruman scene, the palantir... Maybe it'll be in the DVD's edition ?

The few good things :
- Gollum : his inner struggle is well shown. I love the sad and funny at the same time moment in the Forbidden Pool.
- the army of elves. I wish we saw them longer.
- Legolas jumping on the horse
- the fell beast looked nice.
- seeing the simbelmynë
- the Osgiliath set. It does look good, even though the scene is useless.
- the storming of Isengard was cool. I loved when the burning Ent bends and puts his head in the water
- Eowyn
- Gollum's line "stupid fat hobbitt"
- Arwen at Aragorn's grave
+ the Rohirrim charging
God I have to think so hard to find good moments. Maybe I'll enjoy it more on a second viewing.

Where's the epic spirit in this movie ? I felt cheated.
I hated how it seems that PJ thinks Tolkien's story is not enough, and feels the need to insert his own stupid "dramatic" little issues and turns of events. Like : Oh no, Aragorn's dead. Oh, no he's not ! Oh no, the Ents won't attack Isengard. Oh, no they will ! Oh no, Arwen's going. Oh, she's not going ! Oh, an ugly elf ! Oh no, he dies ! ENOUGH ! ENOUGH WITH THE STUPIDITY !

Conclusion = I'm disappointed.
I remember how overwhelmed and happy and crying I was after seeing the Fellowship... I won't be seeing that one as often that's for sure. It left me bitter. Well, I still have the books. And I've always been more a Sil fan anyway.

4 rings| precious?

Check it! [29 Dec 2002|01:36pm]

Fiction Oasis

LotR fiction from yours truly. A visit would be appreciated!

TTT [19 Dec 2002|11:35pm]

Hello I am new to the community.

I am a huge LOTR fan. I read the books for the first time when I was in my early teens. I have read them many times since.

However, I was very disapointed with TTT! I thought it was awful.

LOTR was wonderful. It captured the magic and wonder of middle earth. It also was written well and gave the actors room for character development.

TTT was terrible. It was just one great big way for Peter Jackson and WETA to show how much Computer skill they have. The battle scenes went on forever. I was so bored. The person I went with who is also a fan fell asleep.

Yes the battle for helms deep is huge and yes the computer effects were amazing. However, it was the same thing over and over and over. The could have shortened the battle scenes and gotten the same effect.

Perhaps then they could have ended this installment correctly. The movie did not end the same way the book does. I kept waiting to get past all the battle scenes to get back to Frodo, Sam, and Gollum. The book sets up the best of cliff hangers. Instead they decided that well we have wasted there time with a movie made of 2 1/2 hours of battle scenes...lets let them go home now. They copped out!

There were a few shining moments.
The opening sequence..way cool with Gandalf and the Balrog
TreeBeard and the Ents
Gollum in general was amazing. He stole the show. Better acting from Gollum than the rest of the cast.

I was so looking forward to this movie. I was so excited to see it. What a let down!

I am so very disappointed.
2 rings| precious?

Tig [19 Nov 2002|09:50pm]

[ mood | crappy ]

I love the commentary on the new dvds. It's interesting to hear them talk about their experiences and what they did to kill time. Sorry I just had to let that be known. There are rarely any posts in this community. So...yeah.. Did anyone else get the 4 dvd set?

1 ring| precious?

New TT Trailer [25 Sep 2002|05:31pm]

New things in the TrailerCollapse )

Trailer's going to be avialable for download on Oct. 1 at LOTR.net

Just for you Orli fans... [19 Sep 2002|06:28pm]

[ mood | bored ]

If there are any of you guys around...?

4 rings| precious?

Bonjourno! [13 Sep 2002|09:10pm]

[ mood | hot ]

I am Sabrina, and I love Lord of the Rings. My favourite characters are Boromir, Aragorn, and the rest of the Fellowship.

:) But esp. Boromir.

So, hello again. :)

2 rings| precious?

Guess what.... [08 Sep 2002|12:14pm]

[ mood | sleepy ]

100 Days until The Two Towers!

1 ring| precious?

NEW RUMIL SITE! [04 Sep 2002|08:41am]

Someone HAD to do it.

Yes, it's a shameless plug. BEHOLD-the web's FIRST Rumil site!


Any contributions/links/traffic help would be VERY appreciated. I'll happily credit/link you in return.


[28 Aug 2002|07:11pm]

[ mood | sleepy ]

I shall add my wish for our great Scot!


*sigh* Billeh is one cool goat...no?

2 rings| precious?

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